technological electrical economical psychological
dear blog,
ive been playing with an esp32-s3 tft feather! it was very hard to figure out how to do anything at first, but ive been able to set it up to be a weather station now :) i hope to tweak it more to show the info i want... just have to figure out how coding the display works haha
god also!! i reallyyyy want a new pc. my laptop isnt even that old but it is STRUGGLING irt its ram & graphics card. having a few programs open should not be lagging ;o; i originally wanted a new laptop, bc yknow logical choice, but WHAT IF i got a mini pc instead. its cheaper, and its practically just as portable as a laptop in its own way. arguably its even more portable depending on cord size for monitors n things. my laptops battery is so shit it basically always has to be plugged in so thats what i mean. also theyre so cute. theyre literally so cute just look at them.
"ohhh this mini pc can probably play SOME games but its not For gaming because of its puny specs" meanwhile its literally better by a significant degree compared to my "gaming" laptop. how bad can it possibly be. heh B)
on the topic of things that cost a lot more money than i have, ive gotten possessed with the idea of having an aquarium. main issues with having it are my floor sux, wiring in our house sux, and wrell. costs LOTS of money initially. if im able to get better flooring and wiring in this house nobody can fucking stop me. or if i move out... but who knows how possible that is XD
also had a weird delusion of grandeur that i could maybe attend an online college course? Like. bro im struggling to do the bare minimum, u think you can learn something? and for what? to get a JOB? you know, the thing my disabilities prevent me from doing? no way id be allowed to just do it for fun...
speaking of the bare minimum. ive been having a real hard time engaging in hobbies lately. like paralyzing stress whenever i think about it hard time. i found out its linked to perfectionism and how i need to do a Good Job at the hobby (even if its reading lol???) or else its Pointless. its a bit hard to get past because its perfectionist in such a weird way that its hard for me to wrap my head around to rationalize and work thru it, but im trying! i was able to read for ~30 minutes and draw some stuff today. idk about crochet... maybe i just genuinely dont want to right now? id need to find a project that really calls to me and uh. buy the yarn... the yarn that definitely costs a price especially when you buy multiple... BWEHHHH
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